Letters To Tina

email: Tina Chopp <northinatina@hotmail.com>

subject: I was Tina Chopp

body: For at least a night. I met a poor young guy who happened to be on acid- sometime in the early 90's and he asked for my name. I used to imagine I was Tina Chopp when I was roaming around the ave in the 80's, so I said "Tina Chopp". He was struck with awe and stared at me for a long time. I enjoyed the sensation of power so much, I didn't correct him until the next day.

Recently I started using the dreaded Friendster and it asks who you want to meet. Definitely Tina Chopp. I suppose this is the closest I'll ever get.

To which we responded

Dear Tina

for the first part, it would have been even better if you were male. we're making no assumptions about your sex, but it would be logical to assume that you are female, if you imagined yourself to be Tina Chopp. also, the fact that the guy was on acid is exactly the kind of person this kind of comment was intended for. keep up the good work.

for the second part, if you hadn't made the comment about friendster, we would be inclined to support your claim to having been Tina Chopp. we were neoists before anybody else knew what it was, and fully support the idea of multiple personalities (Monty Cantsin is another one). however your use of friendster leaves us under-enthused about supporting your use of Tina in this way. we're sorry, but The Church of Tina reserves judgement on this. there's too much malware of one kind or another out there to be that careless about your computer, and friendster adds an extra risk with which The Church of Tina would rather not be involved.

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